FORGIVE ME, I'M NORWEGIAN

I don't know about other areas of America or the world for that matter, but in Northern Minnesota one of the best excuses for me when I make a mistake is: " Please forgive me, I'm Norwegian." This works quite well because I am able to defer the focus from me, as an individual, to a cultural issue. Not many of the folks I work with are that familiar with Norwegian behavior. So my coworkers associate all my; goof ups, brainless acts and numerous mistakes as typical of Norwegians.

I'm in a wonderful position. I can do no wrong, as my behavior is all genetic. Luckily, my coworkers never met my Norwegian bachelor farmer uncles, who were smart, creative, hard working and took ownership for their actions. Occasionally I struggle with a little guilt because of this deception, but as I have grown older I've learned to ignore these bouts by immersing myself in useless repetitive behaviors such as; mumbling silly phrases or making funny faces.

I imagine that I am doing a disservice to all the Norwegians in the world, and perhaps to the motherland, but I never have been very good about looking at the bigger picture.

MINNESOTANS SHOULD NOT HAVE TANS IN THE WINTER

It is winter. Not a typical winter in Minnesota, but still; the sunrise is late, it gets dark early, many days are cloudy and although we have had a rather above average winter it still is cold compared to other states.
I've been spending time at a fitness center daily to rehab my shoulder. I have never been a regular in a gym locker room since high school. I never did like it as a kid and for the most part I don't like it as an old man either. No guys aren't snapping me with their towels or making fun of my body shape. Evidently as we get older, men just internalize some of their manly deeds and just fantasize them or whisper them to each other.

But there are a few things that bother me about being in a locker room with a bunch of naked men. Some guys just go to the gym to sweat and shower. They don't sweat because of a great workout. It's because they spend a half an hour or more in the sauna. After the sauna, some guys take a quick shower and off they go, but other guys shave and preen themselves as if they were gods. Now all this sauna activity does bother me a little but to each their own.

Other fellows spend more time talking than doing. I'm not talking about their work habits, although that may be the case. I am talking about their lack of using the gym for exercise. Again, we are social creatures and a gym is a healthy place to hangout. So I need to give these guys a break.

There are other fellows that have a way of walking around nude that just seems a bit abnormal to me. They just seem too comfortable in their naked skin! To me it is almost like they are walking around in their living room wearing casual slacks, shirt, smoking jacket and comfy slippers. For Pete's sake wrap a towel around your loins occasionally, when you are strutting around! One would think that these fellows all shared fantastic sculpted bodies, but it is not restricted to one body type. But again, this is not my main locker room complaint.

The thing that bothers me the most is guys with tans. It is so unnatural for a guy from Minnesota to have a tan in the dead of winter. Our bodies should be white! Every thing is dead outside and we should be a reflection of that environment. Granted maybe a few of the guys have just come back from Florida or some other exotic sunny place, but I suspect the majority of these guys go to tanning salons. I've never heard one of these tan guys say, " I just got back from Arizona". In fact, very few of them ever speak. Maybe they know they should not be laying around in a tanning bed. I've never talked to any of them; even to just ask them the time of day, as I fear I will blurt out some indiscretion. But whenever I see a tan guy in the locker room it think; Minnesotans should not have tans in the winter.

RESOLUTION

Northern Minnesota winters can appear bleak and harsh but the stark reality of cold days and little sunlight also brings the opportunity for its residence to whine, complain and whimper about the intolerable weather or to rise above the difficulties such weather presents and grow thought resolution of mind and spirit.

I declare today that I choose the way of resolution. I do not intend to simplify my resolution to a list of several things I shall do this winter, for I know all to well of my past failures, so I am wisely choosing a pathway of intent that is filled with joy and thankfulness. Who would every pass up the opportunity of live a life of joy and thankfulness? It sounds so warm and bright, much different than the dark, cold season that I share my coexistence.

But in reality such resolution, is very difficult. I have been taught that one can greet all of life with an attitude of joy and thankfulness, but it requires something of us that we find nearly impossible to do. It is self denial. If I am not the center of life, I am freed to accept all that comes my way with joy and thankfulness. "Joy to the world the Lord has come!"

THE ART OF RECOVERY

It is approaching six months, since my motorcycle accident. This is the first time I have experience recovering from a serious injury. I've had a couple of knee surgeries and one back surgery, but in all of them I progressed along rather quickly. So this painfully slow recovery is a new experience for me.

MY "NEW" CX 650 WAITS FOR ME

There have been many disappointments related to my expectations of a speedy recovery. I believed that if I worked hard on my therapy every day and took good care of myself, I would be very near 100% in 6 months. I became discouraged when I didn't see the gains I expected and became concerned that some thing was wrong with my shoulder.

As time has passed, I have realized that it is important to note the small gains rather than to wait for some big break through. My body will heal at its own pace and I need to continue to be nice to it. It is the only body I have.......and where would I live if I didn't have my body? Granted it is a sorry thing in many ways, but I should not be mad at it or speak ill of it.

I celebrate the new pain free movements I can do with my left arm below shoulder level rather than fret about my lack of mobility above shoulder level. I enjoy swimming with my lame chicken wing and focus on how I can swim more laps.

Healing is about taking what your body will give you with thanksgiving. It is recognizing the pace of ones recovery and accepting it.

I don't enjoy being serious for more that a few minutes at a time. Actually I am not very good at serious talk, as I have spent the majority of my life honing my silly skills. So I hope my reflections on the art of healing are not too boring or ridiculous.

I just wanted to get back to blogging again and felt a need to share a few of my recent thoughts.

Until next time..........don't hit anything harder that a pillow with your motorcycle.

THE FIRST RIDE

I rode a motorcycle for the first time since my accident. Flash Gordon, my good friend, motorcycle buddy and cycleologist recommended that I ride my wife's bike after he helped me (he did 99% of the work) get Diane's rear tire on, after tire repair.

I was not planning on riding a bike for a good while yet, as my shoulder is still a long way from working well. At present I am barely able to hold on to the handle bars. I rode the bike about 60 feet then slowly turned around and rode back.

I have only had a few pleasant thoughts about biking. They have floated into my head in the past week. One sunny day, I was surprised when " It will be fun to ride my bike" greeted me. Then a day or so ago " I would like to bike" appeared.

I think it will be a slow process to get comfortable riding again. I am in no hurry and actually expect to wait until next season, by then I should be healed up. I am certain I will need my cycleologist and other Nobodies to help me along. Some times I wonder if I will ever enjoy cycling like I used to prior to the accident.

Like many things in life; time will tell.

HANDICAP ACCESSIBIILITY

Four days ago I was given the OK by my doctor to start walking again. I had spent 87 days in a wheel chair! My motorcycle accident has brought many learning opportunities my way. Although I would never chosen to be injured and wheel chair bound, It has been a positive life changing experience. I may very well keep reflecting on this time of my life for years to come, as it has affected me in so many ways. One effect has been a greater awareness of how difficult it is to get around in a wheel chair. Bathrooms became a big concern for me whenever I was out and about. I learned to plan on encountering difficulties when needing to use a bathroom and when I encountered difficulties so did my wife Diane, as she would often need to help me overcome the barriers preventing me from getting to the toilet! We had some adventures; some real physical challenges. We found it to be interesting and humorous at times. I am very fortunate to have a wife who can meet adversity with a positive attitude and a sense of humor. There was one particular bathroom at a city park call Chambers Grove that just about did us in due to the steep access pathway. There were the bathrooms that Diane needed to help me into because the quarters were so tight, I was unable to navigate them alone. There were toilets that I could barely get on and off ,because the hand rails were not suited for my disability. Some times I wondered if I would need to be rescued! I could go on about heavy doors that I could not open, stall doors that would not cooperate and of course able bodied people using the handicapped stall rather than the able bodied one, but why complain when I can tell you about my favorite bathroom in Duluth Minnesota.

It has assist railings on the side wall and the back wall. It had wipes for the toilet seat.

It has a mat for changing.

It has a very nice shower with railings and an adjustable and removable shower head.

It has an automatic door opener on the outside and the inside. I am going to miss that bathroom!

SCOOTER TRAIL RIDING

Scootering on quite gravel roads for many is considered the perfect outing, but for wild and crazy guys like Randy and myself it is a little too boring.

Give us some mud, ruts and uncharted scooter territory. We like terrain that warns of danger and impending doom.

We found such a trail out near my home a couple of weeks ago. Not only was the trail ominous, but the sky was indicating a possible thunder storm. With a caviler attitude Randy, who's nick name is Mud Slinger, continued on the trail with his steely eyes fixed on the challenging terrain.

Randy and I may like to live on the edge when scootering pushing our skills and machines to the limit, but we also know when to call it good enough and turn back. When we encountered a steep hill on the trail we knew that we had met our match. Next year our scooter will have 12" on clearance when we toss our stock tires and replace them with aggressive knobbies. We still are in negotiations with Man vs. Wild to pay for the custom jobs on our scooters. We hope to do a couple of shows.