During a phone interview this afternoon, President of the Nobody Motorcycle Club "Kickstand" Bergum confirmed the rumors regarding their financial crisis . The club's profits have plummeted in the past year. " We are near bankruptcy after experiencing a year of unprecedented growth and prosperity in 2007" explained Kickstand. " We now have no funds in our bank account and have not paid our staff for the last six months" lamented the dejected motorcycle club president.
As illustrated by the graph, the Nobody income has dwindled to nearly nothing.
When asked about the recent personal purchase of a classic duel sport bike, Kickstand was not willing to reveal if the purchase involved Nobody funds. " This is Nobody's business, so please ask a question that I can answer," snapped Kickstand.
"At present we are looking at all our options to avert a total collapse of our fine motorcycle club. We are hoping that the national bailout program will give us the needed funds to continue. The worst case scenario would involve liquidating all our property and equipment and starting up again from scratch," explained Kickstand.
"I know we have a huge international following. I am hoping that through an out-pouring of support we can receive the needed money to keep this club going," explained Kickstand.
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