Saturday, January 28, 2012

MOTORCYCLE FEVER

Usually by this time of the winter, I am getting a healthy case of motorcycle fever. The symptoms include: reoccurring dreams of riding a motorcycle on a beach in Australia, wearing my helmet and motorcycle boots in the house, making lists of the new gear I need for the coming season and riding my 125 in the snow.


But this is a different winter for me, rather than trying to survive the fever, I'm dealing with motorcycle doubt. My therapist is using a variety of techniques to help me through this difficult time. Visualization, Rational Emotive Therapy and Regressive Therapy are just a few, while we are experiencing some success, my multiple personalities are still suffering greatly.


I have found the best way to deal with motorcycle doubt is to not think about motorcycling! In the past month, I have been successful in letting go of all motorcycle thoughts. My wife is very pleased with the attention I have give to keeping the house clean, doing my own laundry and shopping. You should see the great dining room set I just purchased. The suppers I have been making this past month have been terrific too! Say does any one have a good recipe for Italian meatballs?

Sunday, January 15, 2012

FORGIVE ME, I'M NORWEGIAN







I don't know about other areas of America or the world for that matter, but in Northern Minnesota one of the best excuses for me when I make a mistake is: " Please forgive me, I'm Norwegian." This works quite well because I am able to defer the focus from me, as an individual, to a cultural issue. Not many of the folks I work with are that familiar with Norwegian behavior. So my coworkers associate all my; goof ups, brainless acts and numerous mistakes as typical of Norwegians.



I'm in a wonderful position. I can do no wrong, as my behavior is all genetic. Luckily, my coworkers never met my Norwegian bachelor farmer uncles, who were smart, creative, hard working and took ownership for their actions. Occasionally I struggle with a little guilt because of this deception, but as I have grown older I've learned to ignore these bouts by immersing myself in useless repetitive behaviors such as; mumbling silly phrases or making funny faces.






I imagine that I am doing a disservice to all the Norwegians in the world, and perhaps to the motherland, but I never have been very good about looking at the bigger picture.






Saturday, January 14, 2012

MINNESOTANS SHOULD NOT HAVE TANS IN THE WINTER

It is winter. Not a typical winter in Minnesota, but still; the sunrise is late, it gets dark early, many days are cloudy and although we have had a rather above average winter it still is cold compared to other states.
I've been spending time at a fitness center daily to rehab my shoulder. I have never been a regular in a gym locker room since high school. I never did like it as a kid and for the most part I don't like it as an old man either. No guys aren't snapping me with their towels or making fun of my body shape. Evidently as we get older, men just internalize some of their manly deeds and just fantasize them or whisper them to each other.

But there are a few things that bother me about being in a locker room with a bunch of naked men. Some guys just go to the gym to sweat and shower. They don't sweat because of a great workout. It's because they spend a half an hour or more in the sauna. After the sauna, some guys take a quick shower and off they go, but other guys shave and preen themselves as if they were gods. Now all this sauna activity does bother me a little but to each their own.

Other fellows spend more time talking than doing. I'm not talking about their work habits, although that may be the case. I am talking about their lack of using the gym for exercise. Again, we are social creatures and a gym is a healthy place to hangout. So I need to give these guys a break.

There are other fellows that have a way of walking around nude that just seems a bit abnormal to me. They just seem too comfortable in their naked skin! To me it is almost like they are walking around in their living room wearing casual slacks, shirt, smoking jacket and comfy slippers. For Pete's sake wrap a towel around your loins occasionally, when you are strutting around! One would think that these fellows all shared fantastic sculpted bodies, but it is not restricted to one body type. But again, this is not my main locker room complaint.

The thing that bothers me the most is guys with tans. It is so unnatural for a guy from Minnesota to have a tan in the dead of winter. Our bodies should be white! Every thing is dead outside and we should be a reflection of that environment. Granted maybe a few of the guys have just come back from Florida or some other exotic sunny place, but I suspect the majority of these guys go to tanning salons. I've never heard one of these tan guys say, " I just got back from Arizona". In fact, very few of them ever speak. Maybe they know they should not be laying around in a tanning bed. I've never talked to any of them; even to just ask them the time of day, as I fear I will blurt out some indiscretion. But whenever I see a tan guy in the locker room it think; Minnesotans should not have tans in the winter.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

RESOLUTION

Northern Minnesota winters can appear bleak and harsh but the stark reality of cold days and little sunlight also brings the opportunity for its residence to whine, complain and whimper about the intolerable weather or to rise above the difficulties such weather presents and grow thought resolution of mind and spirit.

I declare today that I choose the way of resolution. I do not intend to simplify my resolution to a list of several things I shall do this winter, for I know all to well of my past failures, so I am wisely choosing a pathway of intent that is filled with joy and thankfulness. Who would every pass up the opportunity of live a life of joy and thankfulness? It sounds so warm and bright, much different than the dark, cold season that I share my coexistence.

But in reality such resolution, is very difficult. I have been taught that one can greet all of life with an attitude of joy and thankfulness, but it requires something of us that we find nearly impossible to do. It is self denial. If I am not the center of life, I am freed to accept all that comes my way with joy and thankfulness. "Joy to the world the Lord has come!"